Silver and Gold

“Make new friends, but keep the old.  One is SILVER and the other GOLD.”

Maybe you sang this song as a child; I did- in brownies and in Girl Scouts.  It still stays with me and guides my life as a great motto.

Before, as an expat it was a guide to keeping and making new friends, which is very important for emotional survival away from home.

Now I want to look at it from a developmental view.

WE ALL have our strengths, what every they may be and hopefully we rely on them to succeed at work and at play.

BUT GROWTH is always about moving from our strengths towards our weaknesses, some say that overused phrase, “Leaving the comfort zone”.

So in “MBTI speak”, for example, I am an INFP with a very strong N, which stands for intuition.  I have known this for years.  The opposite of intuition on the MBTI is “sensing” which is a more “data-driven” approach to making meaning of the world around you.  It’s detail- and analysis oriented and not really me.  For me to grow, one thing I need to do is to push myself to read those parts of the academic papers with graphs and statistics (oh, I hated statistics in grad school!) and not just skip to the end, and really struggle with the numbers.

Other people may be really analytical and good at finances but need to work on empathy and feeling what is in their gut.  Others are really good at meeting new people and getting out there but should also be learning (especially now) to reflect on how they are doing, internally.

Do you get the idea: we need to lean on our strengths in times when expertise is required, and move away from them when we really want and need to grow.  Make new friends, but keep the old, one is silver and the other gold.

Self-discovery is something most people like and here is a test that is easy, if you want to find your MBTI type: https://www.16personalities.com/free-personality-test

My type is known to me, and I knew I was highly intuitive, but I have discovered I am also HSP( a highly sensitive person), and that is an interesting, daunting and challenging discovery in a positive way for me.  HSP stands for highly sensitive person, and the test is from the book (and studies )by Elaine N. Aron (PhD), “The Highly Sensitive Person”.  Being a coach, supervisor and spiritual director (and even teacher, lecturer and speaker) makes total sense for me as an HSP.  

I could stay “hiding in my shell” as an HSP, or I can “make new friends” and push myself in the areas of my weaknesses and grow.  What about you, where do you need to grow?

You have the very same choice, whoever you are:  stay the same and “fossilize”. Or grow.

What do you want for today?

How can I help you to grow and move away from your strengths and get good at one of your weaknesses that is holding you back from success?

Enjoy your week,

Patricia Jehle   patricia@jehle-coaching.com