Are you overwhelmed?  

What is your H.I.T. list and what is your most important thing(s)

Last Friday I got together with coaching and supervision colleagues and I was reminded of one of my favorite (negotiation and decision) interventions:  The H.I.T. list, where you have three questions:

·      What is your Have-to-have?

·      What do your Intend (or would like) to have? And

·      What can (or must) you Trade ( or give up) to get your Have-to-have (for sure) and possibly your Intend to have?

When you think about this, then you can decide what is not on these lists, and discard - or delegate.

Let’s look at a few examples:

When deciding about something nice (a holiday, for example)

H: What do you have to have for it to be a good vacation?  For me, it would need a comfortable setting with good restaurant(s) nearby, a place to go walking from the place… a kitchenette… Since COVID: within driving range, preferably not in a “dangerous” place.

I: What would you like to have?  For me, “dogs allowed” (almost an H, really, but not quite), good ice cream in the vicinity, good public transport, possibly museums nearby, and a cute city nearby. 

T: What will I give to get what I want?  Money, research time, travel time….

Let’s now look at a more difficult example -

When thinking about staying at a difficult job

H: What do I need to stay in this difficult job? Maybe it’s enough pay (the German speakers call that “Schmertz Geld” -or it’s only for a specified length of time (eg: in two years I can leave and can say that I tried my best) or maybe there is at least two colleagues you can enjoy time with or… this must be a very personal decision.

I: What would I like to have? This might be some benefit that is not a deal-breaker but that helps to keep you “healthy and happy”.  Maybe there are free massages, for example, at your workplace.

T: What must I give up to get my H-list at least?  Maybe that means you are “on call” too much of the time, or that your work-life balance suffers more than you like.  Again, this is very personal.  

The biggest question with this situation is a question of energy and time:

How long can I live this way and stay healthy and how much energy am I willing to sacrifice before the deal-breaker(s) are broken?

So, I hope you can try this H.I.T. list out and tell me how it goes.  This can also be used to prepare a negotiation, too.

Wishing you a successful week,

Patricia Jehle                                       patricia@jehle-coaching.com