I have been thinking a lot about stress and trauma. Part of that has to do with two books I have been reading: The Mindful Body by Ellen Langer and The Myth of Normal by Gabor and  Daniel Maté  - both books address these and some other issues. The other reason is that my coaching organization, EASC, had an online meeting about this topic last week at our monthly online meeting.

We all have stress, and we all have some sort of trauma, big or little. How do we deal with stress? I suggest you begin with looking at two kinds of stress: the kind that motivates you to achieve and excel and the kind that causes anxiety and sleepless nights. We all need some stress to get us going (and so we are not bored), but somewhere there is a tipping point, and that point is first, individual and second, dependent on the circumstances.  If you are too busy, then a wee little extra stress might put you in the “danger zone”. You must be self-aware enough to know when you are having normal (good) stress and not – and why.

Stress: So, tip number one: label your stressors.

Then, when possible, lessen them. For example: when possible, ask for help. It is good for two things – sharing the stress is making it less, but also social interaction lessens stress, in general.

Tip number two is BREATHE- either the 4 x $ method or the 4 x 7 x 8 one, which I have recently shifted to. Look them up.

Tip number three: look at your expectations and see if they are realistic or are you trying to be/achieve perfection.

Finally, take on my PPFs® activities and be grateful for the PAST, savor the PRESENT moment and look forward to the FUTURE with hope. (check out some of my blogs on this).

But what about trauma?

That is a very existential issue and can be a difficult one to work on, but it needs to be worked on. When you are experiencing trauma now, you should go to an expert (I can refer you) or if you have experienced it, either as a child or earlier in your life, it is the same. But the earlier you experienced trauma, the more defining it can be for issues that you face today, even health issues, so again, see and expert and I can refer, if you need one. I am not an expert on this, and I do not work “on” trauma, but I can help people who have experienced it, until they find the right therapist, because this issue needs therapy. So, I will “stay with you” until you find someone you feel is right for you.

Even though this week’s topic is a bit serious, tomorrow is the US Thanksgiving Day and I want to wish al my friends and family a Happy Thanksgiving and may you and I be grateful for what we have and have been given. Life is a gift to share.

Have a great rest of the week!

Patricia Jehle               patricia@jehle-coaching.com