It is what it is … or is it?

What can we control?

What can we influence?

What is out of our control?

What we can control (usually) is my response to what I can influence and what I cannot control.

For instance, I am administering oral exams for the next few days – tonight, next Saturday (all day) and then next Monday evening, too. I am able to control the exams, but not the dates and times, which are set by the school schedule/admin, so I prepared and am ready to go as much as I can- checked the emails one last time, etc. My exam times are “late” and on a Saturday, but it “is what it is” and I can hopefully enjoy them as I usually do. Usually, my students do well.

What we can control is all about us: our actions (and preparation) and reactions. Are we being proactive and doing our “pre-mortems”? Or are we living on the “re-active” side of life?

Do we think ahead and do our best to prepare and make Plan A work, have a Plan B and C… or do we go with the flow and hope everything goes “Our Way”. How do we respond when things (like illness) get in the way of our hopes and plans?

What about our influence? This is where we have some control often because of RELATIONSHIP or because other people have more control over the issue than we do. Take my students, for example.

This week my fourth semester students had their English  oral exams. I control the cases and questions and they have partial control in their preparation by a) attending class, b) doing the homework and the online extra study work, and c) studying. They have influence on their mark but not control. I can have an influence on their work, but certainly no control.

I think you understand the concept, which is not mine, but Stephen Covey’s from The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People – a book worth reading, if you haven’t yet done so.

So, this week I wish you an effective one where you take control of what you can and influence what is possible.

Also, Happy First Advent week!

Patricia Jehle                           patricia@jehle-coaching.com