Tomorrow is the USA’s biggest celebration: Thanksgiving.  It lasts four days, but tomorrow is the official holiday.  ‘Tis the season to be thankful!  I realize it would be beneficial for your – and my – health and well-being to really take some time and count our blessings, but this year I am rather sad about a few circumstances, and yet I am grateful about many others.

I have family and friends who are ill, very ill indeed, unemployed, underemployed, and others have major issues like depression and deaths in the immediate family.  These are hard circumstances and they make my mini ups and downs at work seem rather weak.  The kinds of work issues I have can usually be “overcome” with a little bit of reflection and change in my thoughts and behavior. 

Some of my friends and family have other bigger problems, though.  Thinking one’s way out of major problems or a health crisis is unadvisable.  Instead, I need to “be there” for my family and friends as much as I can, though I am often far away from them.  This is hard for me, being so far away.  Maybe you can relate..

Even though your (and my) life is sometimes rather hard, it is still important to make that shift from “pity party” to thankful thinking as much and as often as possible.  Because this can be difficult to do, I have given you some ideas:

Here are SIX things we can all do to be more grateful:

1-Visit someone else that has made a positive influence in your life and specifically thank them.  I was thinking I might try one a week before Christmas—tea is always good at these times, which reminds me of “A Cup of Christmas Tea”, a wonderful book/poem about relationships: http://www.amazon.de/Cup-Christmas-Tea-Tom-Hegg/dp/0931674085 - the gratefulness journal and jar I have already talked about in previous blogs, so I won’t go there.

2-And do remember to smile- your body will feel happier, so smile.  The world may just smile with you, and even if they don’t, you will feel better.  Your body reacts to the way you carry it, and this includes smiling (or frowning).

3-Set a gratefulness alarm and do something.  A friend, for example, takes a photo every day at 3pm and it’s become a kind of portfolio of his various projects.  He posts the pics on Facebook—and I am quite pleased to see them.  We, too, could do this: take a photo every day at a certain time of something that we are grateful for. The dog, the warm sofa, the cookies on the table, the fire in the fireplace.

4-Keep track of how many times you gripe in a day/in a week, and for every complaint, think of two positives that have happened.  Keep everything in a positive balance.  It is very easy to get into the negative thinking habit and this little check-up might help to keep you thinking more positively.

5-Thank someone like the postal carrier or the cashier, the garbage collector, or whoever else you may feel is overlooked, but essential to our lives.  Thank the bus driver or the the cashier.  It will make both your days.

6- Remember to ask yourself what you are grateful for, preferably every day.  I do a gratefulness check at the end of the day- what am I grateful for, and what can I improve tomorrow.  I usually write my “thankfulness list” down and put the paper in a gratitude jar that is my kitchen.

Here is my Thanksgiving Gratefulness list for tomorrow:  Family, near and far; Friends (ditto); a great “slash” career:  lecturer/coach/writer; cool students and clients; I love my dog; my creature comforts (home, health, food); Swiss public transportation; and the amazing fall weather we have mostly been having; not to mention books and further fun plans for January. 

What’s on your gratefulness list?

Of course, it is also a good idea to take time this weekend - and throughout Advent- and think about what you are grateful for, not just tomorrow -- and what you can change in your circle of influence to make your life easier..  

Wishing Happy Thanksgiving to all, those in the US, — and those who are not.  Think of all the things that you are thankful for and give thanks to the Giver of all good things.  

Patricia Jehle            patricia@jehle-coaching.com