Be grateful - even if it's not easy, you will be more resilient

Grateful with such bad news in the media, but how?

Sometimes it’s hard to be grateful for what we have and for what we can do.  It’s especially difficult when it seems like the world around us is going crazy with egotism and power-hungry despotism.  There is bad news everywhere.

Yesterday at lunch a friend remarked that the Swiss bank, Credit Suisse, and its recent scandal is being played out in a way at her husband’s workplace on a smaller scale.  I replied that in at least a few countries in the world, it is also being played out: the person/people at the top is/are more important than those below, although, according to Simon Sinek, (good) “Leaders Eat Last”.  I said it goes against all recent research and leadership philosophy to act in such a self-serving way.  She said that it goes against good old common sense and our “old way” of doing things, namely living by the “Golden Rule”. 

We were both right. What ever happened to being care-full of the other person, especially those who actually do all the work, the “little guy”?  

So, it can be hard to be grateful when we look at the world we live in and are frustrated and perhaps even “hurt” by those who are above us, whether they are bosses, the “big” boss, or someone in government.  Being grateful is important, though, and it is another superpower for resilience. Resilience will get us through these dark days and so gratefulness is one of the keys.  But how can we be grateful?

I’ve been reading a book this past week called Grateful by Diana Butler Bass. She says being grateful can be learned and suggests a few ideas and books likeThe Little Book of Gratitude by Robert Emmons.  Emmons points that our gratitude amplifies goodness, rescues negative emotions and connects us to others in meaningful ways.  Good stuff, indeed.  Then, below I will give a list from Mary Jo Leddy inRadical Gratitude. The second interesting thing Bass suggests is that whole communities should learn to celebrate the good things together, like when we attend sport and civic events, and she says this feeling can help our whole society.  If we celebrate better together, we can maybe find more positive ground on which to move forward.  Ms. Bass’ husband gave her a purple baseball cap with “Make America Grateful Again”. I really like that!  So, find communities you can celebrate your gratitude with and speak about it together, and celebrate.  To focus on your won grateful habits (to learn, here are some other suggestions):

Grateful Habits from Mary Jo Leddy

·     Begin (even if you aren’t ready, yet)- just start

·     Practice gratitude in prayer(s)

·     Gather with grateful people (and avoid the nay-sayers)

·     Live simply

·     Find people who are grateful – historically and in the present (as examples)

·     Think with your heart (trust your feelings of gratefulness and longings for a better – more grateful- way of life)

·     See the world as a whole, as it should and can be (with “soft-eyes”)

·     Find a way to be connected to a wisdom-tradition (I am – the Judeo-Christian wisdom tradition)

·     Find a beloved community

·     Contemplate the face of the world- turn toward the world – after all, according to Bass,

“the goods of creation are destined for the whole human race”.

It’s autumn now and I see the farmers harvesting crops; I have dozens of tomatoes to process in the next few days, myself.  There are oodles of things to be grateful for, but we must start t learn. Start today.

Have a very grateful week, which, in the end will allow you to face the bad news with more resilience.

Patricia Jehle         patricia@jehle-coaching.com