Be a winner and be positive - especially with regards to others
Optimists Wins - ALWAYS
I don’t mean the naïve ones, but the tough-minded, realistic ones.
It is not positive magic, it is a mindset and a way of life.
I recently read an article in the Harvard Business Review, https://hbr.org/2016/03/why-the-future-belongs-to-tough-minded-optimists?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+harvardbusiness+%28HBR.org%29
This article is partially based on a concept of a famous business leader, John Gardner which is called “tough-minded optimism” – is a blend of creativity in ideas, strong convictions about what works and about doing things for the “common good”, and resilience, especially when it comes to the need for change. To quote, “The future is not shaped by people who don’t really believe in the future,” Gardner wrote. Rather, “it is created by highly motivated people, by enthusiasts, by men and women who want something very much or believe very much.”
According to Gardner, leaders can have a mix of abilities and qualities, but there is no replacement for what he calls, “the lift of the spirit and heightened performance that comes from motivation.” I couldn’t agree more.
As we go into the new year, let us remember the WHY we are doing things and if it isn’t a good enough why, then, find something better to do. If you really want to do something well, you need to believe in what you are doing. That gives you motivation of the best kind.
Also, here are a few tips to help you remain optimistic:
1) Smile more.
There is research that proves that if your carry your body in a certain way, it can change your mood. Smiling really makes you more positive. Ask Amy Cuddy.
2) Stand like Wonder Woman.
No joke. This activity also gives you the positive power and presence you might need today to get out there and “win one for the Gipper”. Try it—but best perhaps at home or in the bathroom, not in front of those you will be presenting to.
3) Reframe the negative with gratitude.
Being thankful for what you have and what is good is a very good practice. It actually can change your negativism. Do this EVERY DAY.
4) Avoid Tribalism, if at all possible.
Now you say, “But finding your tribe is the new thing to do!” Sort of yes, and yet, no, in the end.
We can, and should, learn and get energy from like-minded people. And now her comes the big BUT: We can’t ONLY hang out with and respect people only we like and who are like us.
That’s tribalism at its worst, and for me that’s the main issue with our western world (maybe the whole world?) at the moment. I thought I was being original until recently I googled tribalism and found that there were tons of people talking about how we have to reach out to other people of all kinds, hear from them and not “other-ize”. Try googling it. The first couple of entries are definitions and a wiki, but after two or three entries you only find negative articles – from The Guardian, WIRED, The Atlantic, The New York Times, The Washington Post, The American Conservative, Bloomberg and many many more.
Wow! I thought I was being original- but I guess not. It seems tribalism sucks.
Also, the other dangerous attitude that is very similar is what I call “otherizing”, setting an “us vs. them” kind of mentality. I just read a book called High Conflict by Amanda Ripley where she mentions this trap, too. Try to leave out those kinds of words from your vocabulary and from your thoughts. And read the book!
GOOD GROWTH
Another friend would put growth this way: only by getting your of your comfort zone will you actually grow. And thus, staying inside your tribe will keep you from growing, and achieving what you could, if you rub shoulders with people who are different from you. Studies have shown that we actually must get uncomfortable to grow…
Finally, I want to leave you with questions that might help you to think about where are you are regarding optimism and tribalism: How often do you use the word “they” to separate yourself from another group of people? How often do you use “we” with people who are not like you?
I wish you a very optimistic (new) year of growth!
Patricia Jehle
